You're Not Alone
by BTRElevate24seven
Summary: Kendall always felt like he was alone. So he turns to cutting to relieve the pain. After Logan walks in on Kendall cutting himself in the bathroom, can he make his younger friend see that he is never truly alone?


**A/N: Hi, guys. I got this idea by listening to You're Not Alone by Big Time Rush. I would like thank to very special people for helping me over the last few weeks; Dani and Mackenzie. You guys are awesome. Thank you everything you've done for me.**

He was alone in the bathroom.

With a razor.

And that's just how he wanted it. He knew that if any of his older friends saw him doing this, they would kill him; even if he was just thinking about it, they would kill him. But he just couldn't take it anymore.

He couldn't take the stress of being in a boy band. He couldn't take the stress of dealing with Gustavo day after day; it was all too much for the blond, seventeen-year-old to handle.

It was getting to him and the emotional pain he was in felt so bad.

This wasn't the first time that he was doing this to himself. That had been when Jo had left to go to New Zealand to shoot a movie for three years.

That was nearly six months ago and now an array of scars lined his wrists. And of course, he had managed to hide them from his friends and family with rubber bands and long shelve shirts… at least he thought his friends didn't notice.

And they had, well at least Logan had. James and Carlos… not so much.

And it killed Logan to know that his baby brother was hurting so much. He just didn't know why; Kendall was always such a happy guy.

But here was Kendall now, sitting on the bathroom floor with a razor in hand, cutting across the baby soft skin on his wrist. He sighed as fresh blood oozed from the cut and down his arm. Sweet relief.

There was a knock on the door and seconds later someone poked their head in. Logan.

"Hey, Kend-" he gasped, not even finishing his sentence at what he saw. His baby brother was covered in blood and with a razor in his hand, pressed to his baby soft skin.

"Logie-" Kendall didn't get a chance to say anymore before Logan was shouting at him.

"Why, Kendall? Why? Do you not know how wrong this is!" Logan sobbed. Kendall flinched at Logan's words, but forced himself to try to keep calm.

"I don't know…" Kendall muttered. "It just helps."

Kendall turned to face Logan with tear-filled green eyes.

"Helps with what, Kendall?" Logan said, making his way over to his friend and kneeling down beside him, taking his cut wrist in his hand and grabbing a towel from under the sink to stop the bleeding.

"Everything!" Kendall sobbed. He let out a small yelp as Logan applied more pressure to the cut.

"What do you mean, Kenny?" Logan asked softly.

"I'm so damn stressed! And this helps take away the pain… even if it's just for a little while…" Kendall said, not meeting Logan's gaze.

"But, why, Kenny?" Logan asked. "Did something happen?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Kendall muttered.

"Kendall…" Logan started but Kendall cut him off.

"No! Logan, please just drop it!" Kendall yelled. Logan winced. Kendall never ever yelled at him before; not like that.

"Kendall, you know I can't do that. Especially when you're partially sitting here on the bathroom floor, killing yourself," Logan said as he pulled Kendall tighter to his chest when said boy tried to pull away.

"Logan, please, just let me go," Kendall pleaded with his best friend and older brother.

"I'm sorry, Kenny, but you know I can't do that," Logan said softly. "Not until you tell me why you felt the need to do this to yourself."

"Logan, no," Kendall said, shaking his head. "You wouldn't understand."

At this point Logan was getting very frustrated with all of Kendall's secretiveness. All he wanted was to just help his little buddy.

"Kendall, either you tell me now… or I tell your mom what you did," Logan threatened the younger boy. He hated to do it, but still.

Kendall's sobs started getting louder and there were now tears rolling down his face. He didn't think Logan would actually tell his mom. Would he?

"No, Logie, please don't," Kendall sobbed.

"Then you gotta tell me, buddy," Logan said.

Kendall knew in that moment that he either had to tell Logan everything or face having to tell his mom. Fortunately for him, he chose to tell his older brother.

"It's too much," Kendall whispered.

"What's too much, buddy?" Logan asked as he pulled Kendall into his lap and hugged the younger boy to his chest.

"The pressure of everything, it's getting to me," Kendall said, wiping tears from his baby green eyes.

"The pressure of what, Kenny?" Logan asked rubbing soothing circles on Kendall's back.

"The band, Gustavo and Jo l-leaving,"

That was all Kendall managed to get out before he was sobbing into Logan's chest.

"Ssh, Kenny, it's okay. It's going to be okay, little bro," Logan said softly, continuing to rub soothing circles on Kendall's back. "I'm right here, little bro, and I'll be there every step of the way."

And it was true. He would be there every step of the way and his baby brother would get through this.

An hour or so later Kendall had cried himself to sleep in Logan's arms, but he had a small smile on his face.

Yep. Everything would be okay in time. And Kendall would never be alone as long as Logan and even James and Carlos were there to help him.


End file.
